Clues...

I am back after a long drive and as I sit here I feel I must write…

What ?
I don’t know,
Why?
I don’t care..

I can’t tell you how I feel..
I know I feel something, but what I don’t know…
Its there inside slowly gnawing its way up…
Fighting my spirit, who wants it locked….

But what is it … Do I feel sad, or Happy
Or tired, or depressed, or emotional…
Or hated…..

Wish it was easy to define, easy to say, easy to give it a word..
But it is not…
My heart , My feeling, My spirit and yet I don’t control it..
Let it come O Master..
Let it drown me…
If it is my smile, bless me with it…
If its My tear I shall accept it with the same Joy as I would accept your love..

If I am too hard a stone to realize the pain in it. Give it to me in my Dream..
If I am too foolish to see through it…Give it to me as your love..
So that when it’s gone…I shall miss it with pain in my heart…
If I am emotional enough to drown it in my feelings…
Give it to me as a reality so that I may always accept it.

If I left it out somewhere on the highways when the wind washed my face..
And the sun burned it…
When your dust cloaked me and protected me from the cold..
And when your rain drenched me to purity..
Where ever I left it…
Give it your wings O Master..

Let fly and seek me out. In sleep or when I am awake…
And lay to rest this uneasiness…

The feeling is there..
The intensity confuses me..
All it needs are wings…

Yours ………